Washington DC – Nearly a month after the highly controversial healthcare reform bill was signed into law by President Obama, new and surprising details continue to emerge.
Many critics of the reform package had long argued that congress was passing the bill without fully reviewing its contents. After a month of unexpected details, conflicting passages and unintended consequences those who steadfastly plumb the law’s 2,000-page depths continue to reveal ever more startling finds.
Among the finds was $6.37 in loose change that fell from among the pages when a congressional staffer held the printed law over his head and shook it vigorously.
The change was immediately scooped up and placed in a coin kitty by House Majority Leader Steny Hoyer who declared the find a cost-savings enhancement but the money appears to have already been spent by the president who was rifling through sofa cushions looking for money for a pack of cigarettes.
Another interesting discovery was a half-eaten peanut butter and jelly sandwich, stickily plastered in the section referring to insurance mandate enforcement. Although it made the section on mandate enforcement all but unreadable, Treasury Secretary Geithner spoke at length to reassure anxious Americans that the IRS and its 15,000 new agents was still fully prepared to meet the law’s enforcement obligations.
Perhaps one of the most contentious finds was a series of erotic short stories by author Gore Vidal, interspersed between pages 1,625 and 1,842 of the law. An aide to Rep. Barney Frank (D-Mass) immediately denied any knowledge of how the stories were included in the bill before this reporter was able to contact his office for comment.